100 Simple Secrets of Happy Families : What Scientists Have Learned and How You Can Use It (100 Simple Secrets Series) - PDF
نویسندگان: David Niven
خلاصه: Steve Burkett likes to talk about families—his family, your family,families in general. “Just think for a minute about the kinds ofmessages we receive every day,” says Steve, a retired sociologist, aparent, and a grandparent. “We read that people are workinglonger hours to avoid being with their families. We hear thatdivorce rates have hit a record high. Extended families don’t existand elderly family members in need are cast aside. Meanwhile,children are out of control, doing things that boggle the imagina-tion. It’s in the newspapers, the TV news, the shows and movies wewatch, the songs we listen to. We have a family-averse popular cul-ture, and we’re in danger of having a family-averse culture.“We wouldn’t be here without families. We literally would not behere. And yet the message out there is ‘run and hide.’ It’s like anall-encompassing public health warning—except it’s about the illsof marriage, of sibling relationships, of dealing with parents, ofdealing with children. I just saw a study with experts referring topeople in their early twenties as being in an extended adolescence,while they are now calling adolescence an extension of toddleryears, which is like saying the twenties are an extension of the ter-rible twos.“A family structure is as old as recorded time,” adds Steve, “andyet here we are, theoretically advanced in so many ways, and wehear about family life as if it’s some kind of extreme, dangerousxisport like cliff diving. And the worst of it is, for far too many peoplethat’s true. Too many people feel their family life is out of controlor just plain unfulfilling.”Polls confirm that many people share Steve’s concerns. Whenasked whether they thought morals were improving or declining,eight out of ten said declining. When asked why, their most fre-quent response was the instability of marriage and family.Steve says that the long-held expectation that every new genera-tion would enjoy advantages unknown to previous generationsfeels like it is being turned on its head. “We may have more free-dom than ever, more ability to choose our paths in life, but ourfamily life is going backward,” he says. All this at a time when“families are more important than ever.”